Thursday, December 30, 2010

learning by example

I've said it before...but instead just upped the REALLY is time to start locking up the fridge...locking up the pantry. We have locked up meds at home for a long time...but I have been putting off putting the ole padlock on the refridgerator. How bizzare would it be to have company (not that we have that much) over for dinner and have all the food compartments locked up? Bizzare yet it is a reality with PWS I am not like facing. In all of this I have turned my pointing finger around at ME. Growing up...and really until Z was 2 I was skinny...skinny like friends asking...neighbors wondering (while growing up) if I had anorexia. I didn't. I could not keep an ounce on and I didn't like eating. Now? well I LIKE eating good food. ;) I do not eat a lot but ....and obviously since after breastfeeding my metabolism did a switch. In the last 7 years I have gained 65ish pounds....40 of that I did not NEED  to gain.

As much as my son sneaks food is he overweight? no. He is in the 75% for height and weight. Me? I need to be a better example. Up until the uber cold weather the kids and I (sometimes the hubby) walked 3-5 miles a day. I think it was good for the kids but it did nothing to help me loose weight. Now? very little excercise..I'm not even getting on the scale.

Not sure of the answers yet. (although I am going to start tracking food at sparkpeople) I need to be a better example in what I eat. How do I expect my son to keep an appropriate weight when I am not??

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Christmas picture

I just had to post this picture. I glanced over and saw this and said...HOLD THAT POSE. That's kindof how life is every once in awhile I try to pause a moment...hopefully to hold it in my memory forever.

A~man by the way doesn't have a mean look on his face (it looks that way though!) It's just an intense look as he is reinacting church HAHAHHAHAH! Gotta love it.  I wish I could record the song he is singing. Then there is Z~girl who likes to cuddle with Slick. They love each other so much...puppy love.

What's in the big box? any guesses? its for my hubby...he says it's the biggest present he has ever had under the tree.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

The "P" word

PUBERTY that is. Rough enough on the average human being....add in Prader-willi and autism.

I feel like my recent posts have been all negative. WAIT they have been. I need to say I love my life, love my children, love my hubby...wouldn't change it. BUT every few months it seems we get thrown a few new challenges.  The newest. PUBERTY.

I knew it was coming...I knew for the past two years to be on the look out. This week I saw the emotional results of it...that is the only thing I can think of. Looking back....his voice IS mom on the other coast has noticed. He has become aggressive. :( He has had bouts of it that were short lived...most always I was able to direct him to his bedroom so he could yell/ bang the walls all he wanted...but this was maybe a handful of times a year. I experienced the occasional kicking of my seat driving...or swatting me.

This is a difficult time of year for someone with PWS with all the sweets...special events...all around change in schedule at least in our house. I'm making excuses I think....we had our homeschool Christmas party this week....the kids DID have fun but even before getting there I knew A~man needed more monitoring than usual. At one point I put him in time out (for climbing all over the furniture...uhhh who's kid IS this? he doesn't do THAT???) and he hit me. (?????) We leave the party early as I know he is about to self combust...he the CAR. Kicking the back of the seat and screaming on the way home. LOVELY. The reason? I told him he couldn't bring his "goodies" (school supplies) into his room until I found a container to put them in.  I somehow get him in the house....wondering if DSS would be knocking at my door. (he's screaming while I have a hold of his coat keeping him upright on our icy sidewalk) Once inside he attacks me. Thankfully I am not a small punny woman....the hits/slaps do not hurt but trying to get him to his bedroom so he can't hurt Z-girl or me resulted in me wonking up my back/arms/shoulders. I called the hubby...I texted one of my best friends (far far away) hubby called dev ped and got a prescription for a med he prescibed months ago....but we didn't need it and I lost it.  We all survived the day. My biggest pain is seeing the pain in my 9 year old daughters face during the whole thing despite me telling her to go in the other room. (she didn't want ME to get hurt)

The next day we were thankfully at home but the same thing happened. Over what?? something small...something normally we could have talked through...he was cleaning his room and wanted to give/throw something away he made in preschool. I tried to explain that I wanted to keep it for me. Then it all happened again. Thankfully hubby was able to leave work to pick up the prescription. ( even if I had transportation I couldn't have got him in the car)

I PROMISE to anyone reading next post will be a positive one. This is my favorite time of year...I love celebrating Jesus' birthday...I love snow and the cold, I love decorating for the season. :) We have been doing lots of fun stuff...but a blog is a nice place to unload your burdens. (well in addition to God and I am definitely doing that  :) 

Oh and a special thanks to my blog and IRL friends K and D!!! love ya gals!!!

Friday, December 3, 2010

This isn't one of those posts....

You know the type. The kind that will give you warm fuzzies and think I am wonderwoman. I AM EXHAUSTED. This week has been rough on me. Honestly besides field trips, daily life skills, pet care, art, reading (ok now I AM making myself feel a bit better ;) we have done no formal homeschooling. I feel like I am in survival mode. Hubby has had to work several late nights and since we share a car that means the kids have stayed up way past their bedtime and it has threw A~man completely out of kilter. The result is a very anxious, jumpy, impatient mama. Sometimes I wish people that knew us could walk a day in my shoes. Now my days are filled with a whole lot of joy (well not so much this week) but even on the best day I feel like a wet sponged drained of any moisture. YIKES even this week I texted my hubby saying I didn't know if I could continue homeschooling. I feel like I get NO breaks, none, nada. On top of that I feel like I am not doing enough "school" or cleaning, or finishing projects I start. I am going to be 100% honest and say the last 3 days have been complete autopilot.

This results in my son's challenges becoming even more pronounced. The autism is in full force this week! He did this years and years ago but he is echoing/ copying every sound he hears. From the sound of his sister walking across the the floor in her boots to my raspy asthma cough. When we are in a store he mimics sounds/phrases from strangers which comes out sounding very disrespectful and mocking. That is just the tip of the iceberg....I do not want to explain the rest. Here's to praying that next week will begin with a more relaxed mama, thus a more relaxed functional son...and a lessed stressed out beautiful redhead.

Leigh if you read this....I am trying my best to kick this elephant off my chest...I hope you are too!!

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Yeah me...that controlling freaky mom...

We went on a wonderful home school field trip today to see an awesome (seen on TV I believe) Gingerbread house competition at an extravagant old hotel. This is the third year we have been. It's fun but stressful. I did hear typical kids in our group say "I'm hungry looking at these" multiply that by 10 times with my son with Prader-willi syndrome. He did well for HIM though. :)

Afterwards with friends we went to a yummy local pizza place. I ordered a piece for me,(the pieces are HUGE), a piece for A~man...and an order of hummus and pita for Z~girl. (her choice) What did they bring to ds? 2 huge pieces of pizza....excuse me but I'm sure I had a WTF? look on my face. Somehow they thought he had ordered two pieces with one topping...I cannot begin to explain how big two pieces at this place is except to say NORMALLY the kids split one piece and have plenty. A~man was very excited at the two pieces...and then very upset when I said NO WAY.  I dealt...he dealt... it worked out for a pleasant experience...yet somehow due to me not being assertive enough I had to pay for food I did not order. I'm sure I come across as the most uptight woman about what A~man eats.....of course my friends are probably used to it and tolerate me (I hope;) that it is what it is.

While I'm venting...I very well may win grumpy mom of the week. EEEEK.  I've finding myself saying no no no, stop talking, hush, go play way more than I should be intitled too. That's not me...Could the real mama joy please stand up???

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

we could have used an autism card today....

Before the hubby turned into bed...and I came upstairs to blog I said this to my husband "we sure could have used an autism card today. His response...which made me giggle...the kindof of relief giggle after a stressful day "we could have used an airplane full of autism cards dropped on us today!"

Autism is not our sons primary diagnosis but it is the one that seems to affect most of his challenges. Even more so than the food issues with PWS. I'm not sure what happened today. It was a red40 day but I know he didn't have any. It was one thing after another in a downward spiral. Once it started down if felt like there was no way to reverse direction. He felt this too. In the afternoon after Thanksgiving shopping he was going to get a haircut. WELL his barber closed early due to the holiday. THAT'S when things got real ugly. He semi recovered until we went in a store and bought a couple advent calendars (the ones with chocolate) and found some Jumping Beans also. My dd and I have been looking for some and A~man found some at the check out...asking the clerk what they were. I got some for US....he thought I was getting them for Him--------> this resulted in a block later him going ballistic saying he wanted to kill me at the top of his lungs and running from me. He was wearing a hoody and when I saw he was going to bolt (into the street) I grabbed his hood thus causing him to scream I was choking him. On and on and on it went. I'm not sure if people saw...I was just trying to keep him safe. He refused to hold my hand and walk finally his little angel sister offered her hand and off we went.

Later a repeat as we went to another grocery store to get an item I could not find and some redbox movies. We go into this store a lot...he knows everyones name. I'm not sure what triggered it this time but it was related to the movies we were getting. Hubby had him this time....and had to drag him out of the store while I finished shopping. He was screaming he wanted to kill "enter each employees name" :( . I"m not sure anyone heard but I do not know how they couldn't.

Too much shopping? was it the hot cocoa in the morning? who knows the cause....but a card sure woulda come in handy!

Monday, November 22, 2010

Oh what a day....

Ever have one of those days that you can't really say a thing good about? I sympathize with Alexander in the book "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day"  Heck I could write a book about it today.  I rarily have those days....maybe a few times a year but truly today was awful. I knew it was THAT time of year. A time to be thankful alnd I have so much to be thankful for but 3 years ago I went to see all of my wonderful family in WA only to find one had driven off a cliff the night before. I have never cried so much in my life ( I don't cry) over what happened that night and I am just the "auntie". My heart hurts so bad for my brother, sister in law and 2 niecess....along with the others like myself that loved Ryan.

I saw it on my niece's (Ryan's sis) FB yesterday. I remember the day so well. Somehow I had gotten our flight there on T'giving day...why?? who knows??? I remember coming to the airport with ALL of my family waiting. This was unusual. And then my brother hugging me and whispering what had happened. It was God way to say otherwise. :(

Maybe that was the reason for our bad day. I was feeling it and the daughter in particular was picking up on it. I am the most patient woman on the block. (hehehehe) Today? I was not. I was so impatient. I have felt so much pain.

But at the end of the day? I have my children. ALL of my children. For that I am thankful for. Tomorrow I will be a better mommy.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

I did it!

I'm not overjoyed with this template but I got rid of the pesky watermark.

Monday, November 8, 2010

There are positive things with Prader-willi syndrome!!

Just a's been a long time since I've blogged. Lots of changes...lots of stress...and consequently the way my body deals with stress is lots of neck/back/ and headaches. Nothing I can really blog about as I do not want it OUT THERE in blogland but we are plugging along...our family is GOOD. God is just redirecting us where he wants us to go. God is good! :)

There have been many tv shows dealing with PWS...and one that aired just last week. I haven't seen any as we do not watch tv/cable but a friend is going to send me a dvd of it. From what I have read of PWS mom comments on shows such as this they show EXTREME cases...I guess that brings awareness but I wish they would air positive things too. (Maybe they do?? ) I hate to see new parents of pws children get that shock. There are positives. I hope people reading my blog...or people that know my son see that. My son is so much more than the EATING OBSESSION part. He is is a riot...not always appropriate but he makes people laugh. Kindof in a Jim Carrey sortof way (think MASK). He genuinely cares about people. If I know a friend/relative is sick sometimes I avoid telling him as he will obsess over it...worry about them. Here is an example even though it was a stranger.

With some exceptions I have given up on my son NOT talking to everyone we come in contact with ( to have DEEP conversations with). I let him...if things become bordering on rude I intervene. ;) Last week we went to Walmart..we rarily go to Walmart but he knows most of the cashiers. Let me describe the customer in front of us- 60ish,well to do, her cart looked like she was preparing for a dinner party of some sort. She was very snooty IMHO to the cashier who was the same could tell she thought she was better than this lady that worked at Walmart.  She leaves...enter my sons conversation.  This lady he remembered had cats...he asked her about them. Then he noticed the back of her neck was bandaged. He asked her what happened. She went into graphic (too much ahahhaha) detail about some sort of growth she had (I'm sparing you the graphic details) that had to be removed...and she said she was in a lot of pain. What was my sons reaction? He said "I WILL PRAY FOR YOU" . Now these are not just words for my son...if he says he will pray for someone he deeply means it. As a friend recently told me..he has a heart of pure gold.

With that I must say goodnight. Oh but just incase a dear local friend/blogger is reading this...we are praying for you with your surgery. I didn't tell A~man the specifics but he is too! I'm making you a sprize too for your birthday!! Z is helping! Hugs to you K!!!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Let me introduce my friend Heather....

We went to high school....ahem...a long time ago together in SD. I best remember her laughing and smiling! I found her on facebook and have enjoyed so much getting to know her again. She is a wise Godly woman and obviously an awesome mother and wife. Here is her blog. I hope you get as much out of her blog as I do.

As for me I have been absent in blogging world. I have been busy busy....a lot of change going around...some good some not...but I am learning to put issues that I do not know what to do with in Gods hands.

I have been doing a little art and a little sewing...I hope to share with you this week.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Meet Buster Slick!

AKA as SUPER DOG! honestly this dog is beyond a dog. He is so patient. The kids dress him up (gently) and he loves the kids so much. He has put up with a lot of nonsense at times from the boy so we really watch A~man closely.  His only vice is he bolts out the door at any opportunity only to return hours later smelling like he has been frolicking in the bog of eternal stench!!

Giving me a smooch!

I better get a bone for putting up with this!

Look at that doggy smile!!!

Oh and today he was wearing a santa hat and scrub pants....I didn't get a picture of that!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

my amazing son!

On the hubby's day off we have often times been going swimming at a health facility we are members at.  Our house has a pool but meh....we could not afford the money for a new liner and maintenance this year. (or last year when he broke his hip) When we moved in 5 years ago and plunked A~man into the pool by golly he could just automatically swim. Now they did have lessons years before that but more of water safety/getting used to the water as toddlers. The last two years he hasn't had as much interest in swimming. He likes to float and splash but that is about it.

Today he got a wild hair! He swam the length of an olympic size pool 5 times! now he did rest inbetween...I made him! He kept saying "I'm going to do THAT again!" I figured out he had been watching the adults in the lap lanes and was trying to mimick what they were doing. (a crawl type stroke he has never done) That blew me away! He learns so well by watching and doing! I can swim....I normally use the water barbells or do some excercises opposed to swimming. I do not think I could learn a swim stroke by just observing! The fact that he did it 5 times???!!! Ok I AM  bragging! Next time I am bringing my camera. I am also going to look into special olympics swimming...he was swimming faster than his sister!!

Monday, August 16, 2010

Back to school...

or is it back to non school? Anyway today was our day back from a couple months of  having a very relaxed schedule. Z~girl has been begging to start back as she is very motivated to learn. She has enjoyed reading her books but she needs MORE. A~man? He would never admit it but he needs more of a schedule than he has been getting. He was less than enthusiastic this morning. I am trying my best to mix in physical activity between tasks. He has to move...honestly even though I am not hyperactive (hahaha wish I had a bit) I need to move after awhile or I get very sleepy and can't pay attention. This is how A~man is.

For curriculum we are continuing to use Handwriting Without Tears (A) and A Reason for Handwriting (Z), Mystery of History, Christian Kids Explore Earth and Space, continuing with Mastering Mathematics, and I am hoping to add on Easy Grammar, and All About Spelling in a couple of weeks. For reading/literature/phonics I use a mix and also wing it as this is my favorite subject. Oh and I picked up an older Switched on Schoolhouse 4th grade math/grammar for Z for a good price today. She isn't ready for the math but the grammar will be perfect for her to do independently. I'm sure I have missed something...oh ART/SEWING/COOKING well that is my favorite thing to do/teach besides literature! Here is Miss Z working on a pioneer bonnet. We are hoping to enter a couple sewing and art projects in the fair next month. A~man did an awesome painting last year that won a blue ribbon in the special needs category.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

No sweeter sound

Today was the finale of A~man's daycamp program at church. I feel a bit guilty as I have not sent him as much as I normally do so he missed out on a lot of events. Well he missed out on church a family we have had many wonderful events.

The presentation just made my heart swell! They demonstrated some of the activities they did during camp. The games they played and what it taught; patience, thinking of others above yourself. It showed the higher functioning campers helping the lower functioning campers which resulted in them benefiting mutually. They sang songs together and then....some had solos! As I was listening to such songs as "Jesus Loves Me" coming from a young lady with severe CP I got goose bumps and tears...infact listening to all of them...their expressions and their genuine love for God caused me to keep goose bumps. The reaction they showed to applause was so fun to watch. They were so proud. The whole time I just knew God was watching with love and adoration of these adults and children. His perfect creation made just how he wanted them to be.

The people in charge of this program at church are so selfless and giving and most are volunteers. Such good examples of how God wants us to be.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

two lunches

Sometimes as a parent of a special needs child you have to let go...even if it is for just a bit. When A~man goes to daycamp (two mornings a week) that is my attempt. As much as I would love to be I am not going to be able to be by his side forever protecting him and stepping in when his judgement is not enough. Today was such a day.

Tonight was hubby's night off and we went to eat at one of our favorite spots. With the conversation between hubby, son, and I  we realized ds had TWO LUNCHES at least. I send him a plentiful healthy lunch.Today evidently they had hamburgers/hotdogs/french fries etc. That would have been ok (I would not have been thrilled) but he had that. Plus somehow he ate everything in his lunchbox.  Did A~man get in  If I was as hungry as he probably gets and had the food I would have eaten it. Anyone would have. BUT he has a person that goes to daycamp one on one with him and somehow this happened. I'm not a happy camper. Where was his helper???Only someone with a child who has PWS could understand this. Now if that happened with my Z~girl I would have been just fine.

Now internally I am fighting myself...knowing he HAS to be away from us at times....but gosh trusting someone with your sn's child is TOUGH!!

Sunday, July 25, 2010

am I CRAZY or what??

*warning..this is just a lot of ramble. My normal posts about PWS, autism, homeschooling, etc etc will return in August...I hope! ;) *

Heather if you read this the book I am reading is Quaker Summer . It is excellent. In fact the main characters name is Heather.

On with the crazy thoughts. I seriously want one more baby. With infertility I wonder if this feeling will ever go away? I always dreamed of having a baby at my mother (ME) and like both of my grandmothers. Now I'm not talking about getting pregnant. (although God surprised me with Z-girl!) I mean becoming mommy for a third time which would have to be through foster care. The foster care system with A-man aged me...but I can go into the next room, kiss his sweet face and know it was worth it and meant to be. Most likely we would have to go through another county as...well...we have a reputation here. (for fighting for what is right...which is not necessarily what DSS wants) Do I have it in me? I feel like my motives are purely selfish. Sure I want to help a child that needs a home...but even more so I want another baby in my arms.

Oh and if you knew how busy my current life currently can would wonder what I was thinking. PWS is a constant journey filled with ups and downs. I told my mom last year briefly awhile back that I wanted another. She said " I hope you do not get one with problems." To give her the benefit of the doubt she is 81 and the language with disabilites is different than what she knows. I have went off on her a couple times (God forgive me ;) for comments. In my heart I think most likely it will be a child with extra needs. Anyway that's enough for tonight.

Friday, July 23, 2010

soul searching...

So much I could blog about I do not know where to start. I did turn 40 a week So I have been doing a lot of thinking about stuff and just cannot express it all right now. I do have a very fun overnight trip (hubbys bday present to me!) with a couple friends in a couple weeks. Spa and the great outdoors. I can't wait.

I am reading a really good book right now. I do not think it is an accident I picked it up at the library. It's on spirituality, church, serving God...good stuff like that.  We haven't attended church much this year. Our son has as he sometimes attends the special needs program they have. The church is HUGE. I won't/can't say anything negative about the church just that I wonder if somewhere smaller would be better. I'm hoping God will lead us somewhere.

I hope to get back blogging and doing artsy stuff soon! Z and I are working on some sewing projects though.

Friday, June 25, 2010

What every mom needs to hear periodically

"You are doing a good job mom!" from a stranger. I love when this happens. It happens quite often with my kiddos.

 Today because A~man got a certain amount of tokens this week ( a token system I started mainly for daycamp but also for reinforcing positive behavior at home) we went "downtown" for a soda and to play in a very cool old time arcade. (I'm dating myself...hubby and I used to play in arcades) When we were leaving the lady that was running the place came up to me and said "you are doing a good job mom!" plus a few other things that made me say thank you with a huge ole sappy grin on my face. : D

It couldn't have come at a better time as I was in tears last night. A~man stole a friends cell phone out of her purse yesterday and the little miss has been very sassy to me...but only at home. *sigh* I do my best but sometimes it gets exasperating. But to have people see that my children DO have good manners, they are not afraid to speak to adults at all...that makes it all worth while.

My two puzzle me though. At home A~man (for the most part) is respectful, helpful, cooperative, and affectionate. Z-girl? at home she can be sassy, disrespectful and She is hardly EVER  this way in public...A`man well he has most of his issues outside of the house. Go figure.

I love them so much though....I love being mama!!

Monday, June 21, 2010

appreciating the ups

Isn't that what life is about? Life would be so boring if we got everything we wanted, when we wanted it, how we wanted it. Fortunately that is NOT how God works. But it is important to sieze the good moments to give you strength during the difficult times.

It's funny...the pic of A`man on the beach examining something...I have a very similiar picture of him at 3....doing the same thing. Mr inquisitive! The last picture reminds me we forgot to take a picture of my little mermaid with a sand tail....we have done this for several years...a good excuse for a trip to Charleston later on!!

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Bittersweet holiday...

I am very thankful I had a hardworking dad that enjoyed spending time with me. It has been 6 years. I wish he could have been able to know my children as big kids but I'm glad he met them as young children. This picture is one of my nieces, great nephew, my dad, Z~girl, and my mom. I need to scan some pictures of my dad and I. The last one is A and Z with their grandma and grandpa E.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Our trip...our adventure!

Keep in mind...if you have read my blog at all...things hardly ever go as planned. That is just how it is.

We arrived at isle of palms midday on Tuesday. It was hot. I was warned. It was hot. Where I live it was maybe in the 80's. There? it had a heat index of 112. It was like a hot moist oven. Now I remember why we normally go earlier in the year. We ate lunch, watched cartoons (a treat...we do not watch tv) and in the evening we went to a nice restaurant and then went to the pool and beach. Well Z girl went swimming. With prader-willi syndrome their body has a hard time regulating temperature. A~man got really sleepy...he slept a lot.

On Wed morning he was still very sleepy in the morning but it was much cooler...only about 90. ;) The hubby and I took turns taking Z out while A~man stayed inside. My favorite moments of the trip were Z and I riding bikes on the beach...taking breaks ever so often to go in the ocean. It was such special time just her and I. In the afternoon we went to Boone Hall Plantation . We really enjoyed this. I would like to go back when it is cooler so we could spend more time. I especially loved the Gullah presentation. That night? mmmmm crablegs!

Thursday morning we had planned to wake up and go next door for bluecrab omelates..and then go explore downtown Charleston for souviners. .mmmm....but wait what really happened? it was 8ish....the kids were starting to wake up. At 8:30 I heard ds in my suitcase but told him to go back to bed for a little bit. DD starts yelling he has something in his mouth.What? childrens tylenol. I go looking for the wrappers to figure out how many he had (turned out to be the dose for his age) when I find an empty bottle of benedryl in the trash. OH CRAP. I know there was a bit over half so we called poison control...if it would have been half a bottle the recommendation would have been to let him sleep it off. We were not sure so we packed up FAST and went to the ER. Meanwhile he keeps falling asleep. It took a bit to explain about the PWS and the autism as they were asking if A`man said WHY he took it. Everyone was so nice. It took awhile but he drank the charcoal...we had to sit for a couple hours...he was NOT happy as poison control said no food until he was seen by a dr. He is fine. I am fine...I guess. At home we keep meds locked up or out of his reach.I just figured he wouldn't get into the suitcase...or the med. Next time we will get a lock for the suitcase. MOMMY GUILT ugggg.

I do have a lot of nice pictures to share later of the funner moments. :)

Monday, June 14, 2010

Going on an adventure...

to one of my favorite southern places...well south/east. I am so excited!! Of course I need to wake up in 5 hours and I am still packing. I'm hoping to share some awesome pictures and tales of our adventures!!

Friday, June 4, 2010

Here I am!!

I am still alive and well in NC!! I survived my BFF from high schools visit. Was my house perfectly clean? no. Heck I am still dealing with the fact that the drain in the master bath (we gave them our bedroom) was more plugged than I ever imagined and the "new" light hubby put in our bedroom (after putting our light bulb in ds's room the night before) was wonky. yada yada yada.  Did I enjoy the visit immensely? YES! We went camping and it was so much fun!! This is the second time our girls have met ( my dd is about 1.5yrs older) and they had a blast. Z has declared Miss O in the top 3 of her friends. (she's the only girl in the top 3...A~man is in number 1 position ;) She also has two sons H who is 3...and so funny and cute and J who is 11. J was beyond bored when we were at our house...with no TV...and A-man was getting on his nerves in a big way. But I enjoyed the visit so much! I hope we can meet up with them again soon inbetween our states.(AL/NC)

Next week I am doing our homeschooling tests. CAT tests from seton. In years past we have had a former SN's teacher do Woodcock Johnson but for this year we will do it this way. After that we will take a couple months off. Of course it won't be completely "off". For A~man I will have him work on the reading program we signed up at the library for. Our O/T is not able to work this summer but I will continue with that in "fun" ways-writing letters/postcards to family and games.

For Z~girl I just bought two cookbooks that are recipes, manners, and games from the 19th century (the time period I am a wee bit obsessed with ;) I hope to share some of it here in my blog. Tonight Z and I made chicken soup with homemade noodles. I have made chicken soup before but this time I didn't use any short cuts. (well I guess I did as I didn't pluck the chicken) Z made the noodles and also made us a salad using the lettuce we are growing. It was soooo good. I'm hoping that her and I and maybe A~man will try out a recipe a few times a week. Also I will be teaching Z how to sew with a sewing machine. (she has her own!) I have taught her some handstitches but now on to bigger things!

As far as reading for Z...we signed up for the reading program on Wed and she is already done with the requirements for all the prizes. I wonder what the librarian will say. A~man on the other hand will take the whole two months...and that is perfectly ok.

OH I'm going to add a picture. I found a distant relative on FB that has posted tons of pictures of my grandparents and great grandparents on my dads side. Most came from Dennmark. Seeing the pictures makes me even more interested in the pioneer days!! This is my great grandmother and grandfather in the late 1800's. My great grandma looks so young!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

How I became mom to my miracle PWS son part II...

So we got back from our mini weekend springs...massage...relaxin. God was just gearing us up for our next adventure! They kept flip flopping him from the hospital to back with his bio family. He originally (and finally) was taken away from bio family due to medical neglect. When he was born he spent 3 months in the hospital...then he went home with his biomom. She also has did the father so they were not capable of taking care of a medically fragile child. There are more details but that would be a novel seriously. He came to us the last weekend in Feb 2000. He came with a SW...her supervisor...a nurse to train us on tube feeding...another person to train us on the apnea monitor and C pap( I think that is what it was called it has been years) machine for when he slept. He was 4.5 months old. He sat there in his car carrier and I remember looking down at him...did he smile at me adoringly? hahahah no he rolled his eyes, turned his head and went to sleep. :)

It was a crash course even though both of us had some training. His crib was in our bedroom and it was like a disco with his feeding machine clicking and his apnea monitor flashing. His care completely took over my (and hubbys) life...I only admit this now but I stayed so busy with his needs, drs appts, DSS visits with the birth mom that I rarily remembered to eat and got REALLY skinny. That is when I realized- in order to take care of a child you must take care of yourself...... more later. (this is a crazy month!) I may even find a bitty picture of him for next time.

Monday, May 17, 2010

How I became mom to my PWS miracle boy part 1

I have searched my blog and cannot find where I have told the complete story of how we became parents. It may be there excuse me if this is a repeat. ;)

Let me summarize just a bit...the journey to parenthood was a long one. The hubby and I have been married 19 years at the end of this month. I was almost 21 when we got hitched. When I was 23 I had a misscarriage at 8 weeks, that started the infertility battle. About 5 years later I had a laporoscopy and endoscopy that found severe Endometriosis. They lazered it off. It came back and can be very painful. I had/have it in places you cannot imagine.I had a few IUI's that were unsuccessful. I was told I could not become pregnant without invitro which financially was not an option. 1999 we decided to pursue foster care. We wanted a BABY. We were told that not many babies were ever available. We finished our liscensing in January...we were called the beginning of Feb about a baby boy with special needs. He needed placement immediately. We had overnight plans that we kept...little did we know that would be the last ALONE overnight we spent until ...well the present. But very worthwhile...more tomorrow. :)

Friday, May 14, 2010

two buddies unite!

Today we were getting in the car to leave the library and I look out my window and see A~mans best buddy from preschool. (what 5-6 years ago?) This little boy C also has PWS. I wish I had a video of their reunion. Before I could stop him he jumped out of the car and yelled "C!!!!) and then C was just as excited! They have seen each other maybe  3-4 times since preschool. They were like huggable magnets drawn together. It is hilarious and endearing all at the same time. They kept hugging each other putting there arm around the other....I told the mom that her/his phone number was still on my fridge. I intend to call it this summer. C is not on growth hormone I found out so I was shocked that he was taller than my tall A~man! He is also a lot heavier than A~man but such a handsome engaging boy that reminds me so much of my son!

I have neglected my blog. This is a crazy month and I still have yet to schedule the required HS testing. Ugggg. This is not normally something I worry about but maybe a few weeks a year. We have to do the Woodcock Johnson (I think that is the name) as A~mans reading isn't up to doing other kinds of testing. I will not stress I will not stress...Next weekend is a play the kids are a lot of loose ends to tie up this month.

Also two weeks till my BFF from high school comes! I am so excited!! I have been a decluttering fool! We even rented a dumpster to work on the garage....get rid of the old pool liner from our above ground pool...and a couple other larger things. The house is really shaping up and I love the feeling!!

Saturday, May 8, 2010

This is what it is all about....isn't it???

Our neighbor lady called the kids over to her yard. When they came back I found these two sweet children at my door saying HAPPY MOTHERS DAY! I'm a lucky mama. Thank you God for my two wonderful blessings.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

rough afternoon/evening...

I won't go into the details. All about impulse control and finding stuff and putting it in his pocket to cause mama a few new gray hairs. So hard to let go....allow a child with impulse issues to BE yet to keep them and those around them safe. Just beating myself up a bit....and thanking God for extra guardian angels. I wish I had an extra set of eyes.

Very hard to childproof at 10. You put up the obvious but still...

Monday, April 26, 2010

Raingutter Regatta = extreme anxiety for a mom with a child that has Prader-Willi syndrome

A~man has been in scouts for 3 years and is now finishing his Bear year. I will admit that I truly only do Boy Scouts so A~man can have social interaction with just boys (which is a challenge for him) the leaders are awesome, accepting and inclusive. Also I love the activities they do which are SO what our family likes to do with it being nature and the big outdoors focussed.  Most parents...or so it seems...go 101% with their boys in scouts. Admittedly I do about 75%. I am hoping I can pull it together so he can complete what he needs to for the year. But on top of geography club,  drama club, Brownies, 4H, Z~girls running club, Z's soccer, A's occupational therapy and HOMESCHOOLING...I am doing the best that I can. So I am really praying about what I need to do as far as activities for next year. I am a homebody and haven't been spending as much time at home as I would like!

Tonight we participated in the Raingutter Regatta . We go to meetings and a couple other extra events but due to hubby's work or our busy schedules we do not go to the extra stuff. Infact I have avoided the Regatta like the freakin PLAGUE. Why?  The boat part I am fine with but when they are finished they fill up the raingutters (foil over the top) with ICECREAM and the kids eat out of it. Now I am not a germ freek so that is not the issue at all. But as a mom of a child with PWS it is emotional for me. A typical child may eat and eat all crazy like but y'know what? he WILL get full...or throw up. A child with PWS does not know this "full" they would eat and eat and eat.  I was feeling such anxiety about it and wondering if it would end with me dragging him to the car. But you know what? That did not happen. YES I let him eat more icecream than I would normally do but then I whispered in his ear "3 more bites" then you are finished. I underestimated my boy...he was just fine and walked away. He did brag about how much he ate but so did all the other kids. This gives me hope that maybe...just maybe as he grows older he will be able to walk away from food...or at least be redirected to something else.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

A posey...

I took a million pictures today...but I will just post this one for now. I would love to have some of these in my yard!

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Look what the miss and I created!

 On Saturday miss Z and I had some girl time without the boys. We went to a place that you can paint your own pottery. She had been a couple times for a friends party, her party, and to paint a Christmas ornament. For the longest time though I have wanted us to go there and paint some cups as we love to have tea together. When I was growing up I had a mug that had a little frog in the bottom of it. I remember when I wasn't wanting to drink my milk (I was really young) it really helped knowing I could see that frog peeking it's head out of my milk. So that is what Z and I did. We were there almost 2 hours ahahah but the time flew by! We drank a coke and painted. We did not originally plan for them to color coordinate but by the time we borrowed each others paints they did. 

I think they turned out adorable! I especially like Z's the smaller one.

what does a mama do?

Almost every Wednesday afternoon A~man goes to his favorite place on earth. Church. He has a "helper" and he gets to visit the special populations class. This is a wonderful day placement class for adults with disabilities that have aged out of school. A couple of these peeps I had as preschoolers when I was a teacher. (oh that makes me feel old) A~man is at a highter level than most of these and loves to go and help and socialize. He also eats dinner there. On rare occasions he goes and listens to the band practice for the teen service...they even let him play the drums. (in practice)

Today we went for a walk, did school, and hung out with hubby as he had the daytime off. Normally A~man gets a nap...but not today. I guess he was ornery, kicking, hitting, and *gulp* swearing. (his swearing is pretty mild usually involves phrases using $hit...but non the less not appropriate anywhere let alone CHURCH! He also quite proudly told me when he got home that he bit his helper....I haven't had this in a long long time. So when he go home (7) I had him take a bath and go to bed. He will also lose out on hanging out with helper (that he LOVES) on Friday which ultimately means more work for me. But that is how the cookie crumbles sometimes I 'spose.

Tomorrow is going to be insanely busy day. Somehow I need to fit in Drama club, watching a friend at the special olympics, 4/H and soccer practice. Followed by date night. I think I will have to cut out something tomorrow but it won't be date night! :^)

Monday, April 19, 2010

Why we do not watch television

It's going on 5 years on being television free WOOHOO! There was also a couple years earlier in our marriage where we did not watch. When we moved into our first home (the other was a rental) we just decided cable wasn't something we wanted to spend the extra money on.

I need a disclaimer...I do not judge people that watch tv..I am not completely ANTI TV but for our family it just works.When we go to friends, family, hotels do we boycott their tv? nahhh! So far anything they are watching hasn't been stuff I do not want my child to see. I like to watch it a bit myself on rare occasion when it is there. But it is not my choice of leisure time activity for my family. I admit to watching LOST on netflix years ago...and House...

Not in any particular order but one reason that comes to mind is commercials. The lack of commercials I think has made it so my children are never " I want I want" with any gimicky toy..product. OK I am a prude too...some commercials are not what I want my child exposed to right now. "kid shows" my kids have seen a few of them but to me it seems like they take what should be a childrens show and make the topic about older teen situations. Hee hee my dd barely knows who Hannah Montana is...I like that. ;) At 8 she does not talk about  I like that...there is plenty of time for that when she IS a teen. Violence. Trust me my son does NOT need to see violent cartoons. He is a mirror of whatever he is exposed to and has an imagination that makes up enough stuff it shouldn't on it's own.

Now we do watch videos...but not much. Maybe 30min - 1hr a day. We have a ton at we check out from the library often. Redbox is also an awesome invention.;) We do have a Wii but sonny rarily (maybe once a week) plays it and Z a few times...but they only play when hubby is here as I just cannot get into it. (although it is fun when I do)

What DO we do for entertainment? We love to spend time outside. Hiking, walking and in the summer swimming...camping. My daughters favorite spot is in a tree with a book. Z and I love doing crafty stuff and I am trying to increase that this year. Oh and of course activities with our homeschool groups...but I'm finding we have too many this year. My vice...I admit though is the the time others are watching tv...I am surfing craft blogs. ;)

Sunday, April 18, 2010

I admit...I am a packrat...

Does that go along with creativity? Can I use that excuse?? ;) Well I've decided to blog about it to keep me accountable. My BFF from High School is visiting us the last weekend in May. This is the wonderful friend/family we visited at Thanksgiving. I am sooo excited/nervous/anxious/ get the point. Her house? Well she's a dr and her hubby is an AF the house is NICE, decorated perfectly, and very clean. She has help though. ;)

I'm not envious (well maybe a bit on how orderly and decorated it is) as we have a really nice home too. Only I do not have much help (hubby and big T do mow/weedeat) and we have some major things we need to have done. Our deck is in desperate need of being overhauled and we also need a new liner for our above ground pool,and we need a new roof. Last year it waited as did anything that needed $$ with hubbies broken hip. It will get done...gradually...but that is not what this blog entry was supposed to be without. I am offtrack which happens easily.

I have decided in the next 4-5 weeks to declutter the house top to bottom excluding the garage THAT is dh's. Now my friend Topsy KNOWS I wanted to do this in Jan...I DID do well starting off but got off track way before completion. ;)  So I ran off a calender for the rest of April and May designating where I would be focussing each day. Today I also typed up A and Z's goals for the rest of the spring for help me keep them on task for what I want to accomplish.

I'm also hoping to get some pictures and art up on the walls also. I already started on something for the entryway. I have used my painted papers on the matte portion of a picture (that I took) that was already up there. The problem is...I cannot find the photo now.....thus my need for an overhaul. Can you say ADD mama?

Monday, April 12, 2010

It's all about perspective

Today I decided to do some math review over things I thought (thought is the key word here) they knew. Z~girl did pretty good. was as if he had never done it before. For A~man it was telling time up to each 15 minutes. NOPE. Also a worksheet with several coins to find the total and I also had real coins out as I know when he was tested last year he wasn't able to do it with unrealistic coin pictures. NOPE. He could still identify the coins and their value but not with several coins adding them together. He was frustrated and I was deflated like a balloon. See he wasn't being non compliant although he was a little spacey...I honestly think he forgot...along with a wee little Z~sister voice reminding me "do not fuss at him I think he is really trying!" (my voice of reason this morning) So I decided it was time for a break.

We stepped out into the sunshine, the warmth, the breeze and I know I exclaimed ahhhhhhhhh! PERFECT day. I walked the dog around the yard and remembered a different time when we first moved to this house gosh I think it has been 5 years. Back then Z was almost 4 and A was 6.5. In the last 5 years he has changed so much! I remember step MIL helping to watch the kids while we unloaded things. I remember coming outside and seeing A running from our yard to the house behind us that is quite a ways a way. MIL couldn't catch him so I caught him. This happened many times. I remember coming into his room one afternoon when he was taking a nap...or so I see him climbing out the window. This has been more recent but I remember the walls in his bedroom before we had them redone this past year. You see he had created 2 holes..(fist sized) beside his bed and one behind his door and picked and picked the wallpaper, the sheet rock paper all the way through the wall. Up untill a few years ago he was still "fingerpainting" (you do not want to know WHAT) all over his walls. He used to fling all kinds of things (again...not going into details) down the air/heating duct in his room causing the whole house to smell like....well you do not want to know. He used to constantly hug strangers...we have narrowed that down to friends although he needs to ask before grabbing people..what can I say he LOVES people. He no longer does these things! I need to internally celebrate that! He IS advancing, maturing, sure he has some new "issues" but thank goodness these old ones are past us! I have no doubt he will be able to learn basic to use money...tell time I KNOW he has the ability...but it is on his schedule not mine. (Joy repeat this 100 times "his schedule") I truly believe he will keep advancing on his reading...s l o w l y...but he will be able to read functionally as an adult. I WILL insure this. ;) I also need to celebrate his knowing and understanding about God...He is growing up to be a Godly, caring, sympathetic man. I love him so much!

Here is a picture. Most I put on my blog I have taken but this one was taken by a good friend this winter.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

My journal is finished! woohoo!

Well except for filling its pages of course. I used some colored hemp to lace the notebook together. I'm not sure I would use this exact method again but who knows. :) THIS is an accomplishment for me. I love starting and working on sewing and artsy projects but finishing stuff is challenging for me. Take for example this awesome blue jean quilt that is on my couch waiting to be finished...I started it a year ago to use camping. Also I think I skipped week 1 project as I was having a hard time painting pages that would work for that. I guess that is what I will work on this week and also practice some ATC's...and make my SIL who is going to be having surgery soon a card. Later this week I will gather supplies to make the tote! Thanks for all that have looked and commented.

Friday, April 9, 2010

Sneek peek of my Artistic Mother Journal!

I have been working so hard on this! It is....was almost done but I couldn't figure out how to put the cover and the back....back on the notebook! So I went to the hubby and he tried but the wire got messed up. GASP. We brainstormed and came up with a solution that will be even better. :)

But I wanted to at least share the cover.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

an Artful beginning!!

Ok here are some pictures of some of my painted papers. The goldish brown one with the red around it is one of my favorites. It looks a lot different/better in person. I also like the really dark one that is mainly green with blue and red in the center...I just wish it was a couple shades lighter. Hopefully someone can tell me how to make future pictures lighter. (although I do like the bold ones!) In the past I have worked with pencils, charcoal, pastels, and water color...never acrylic! The way it spreads though makes me smile. In fact every evening I have played even when it is just applying gesso I get a sappy smile on my face!

I had a BLAST at Michaels....spent too much money...shhhhh (some women buy shoes;) but with the 30% coupon it knocked a lot off the price. NOW to create something using these!

Our first spring hike of the year

I believe we have taken at least a couple prior in what would be considered the "technical" start of spring but this hike last week was the first in REAL spring weather. In the last two days you could almost see the pear trees and our mini weeping cherry open in full bloom!

In the car Z~girl asked if she could bring her book and I said "sure, why not" thinking she would read when we took breaks. No. The child read the ENTIRE time we were hiking. Fortunately it is a very familiar path. People got a complete kick out her when they passed us. I hope she continues this joy of reading. She read the book in a day...and the hubby wondered why I wish he would have found her the full length novel. hahahah

Friday, April 2, 2010

The Artistic Mother

A few weeks ago I ran across this awesome book book at Barnes and Noble. I have been absorbed by it ever since! I even found the authors blog (no I am not a stalker hahahah) and after that found a group of mothers that is going through Shona Coles steps in making creativity an everyday occurance. So I have been gradually gathering supplies...making some painted pages. Also I have been looking at the others art and feeling just a wee bit intimidated. ;) It is AWESOME and I am a wee bit behind but I have been encouraged by Trudy that I am welcome to join in and encourage any friends to join in. C'mon you know you want to!

When I go to visit my mom...I am always filled with warm fuzzies as I look at her walls. Her walls are filled with my art from high school and young adulthood. Somehow through infertility, eventual parenthood and homeschooling I have lost out on expressing myself visually. There is no excuse for the blank walls that fill my house!

Tomorrow I have a 30% coupon off your entire purchase at Michaels...and I intend to use it. I need more stamps and ink before I feel comfortable posting my creations so far. Z~girl being the artsy girl that she is has been joining in. So stay tuned...I might have some artistic creativity to show y'all!

Friday, March 26, 2010

always the last to find anything out....

I'm angry, upset, and my feelings are hurt. Whenever anything has happened with my parents I am the last person to know. When my dad died...he passed in the morning....I did not find out until late afternoon and it was an accident. One of my sister in laws called to see if I was ok and I was obviously confused. I found out about my moms last trip to the hospital with extreme hemoraging a year ago (too tired too check spelling) on FACEBOOK. Tonight one of my brothers calls to tell me my mom was admitted YESTERDAY. Thankfully it is not over the top serious (but at 82 anything could become) but she has had extreme back pain- stenosis of the spine as it turns out along with scolliosis, arthritis, osteoporosis = a lot of pain. She had an injection and should be ok.

I do not cry easy but I was so upset at my brother on the phone as this is not the first time. He apologized but not sure he understands. His wife sent me a couple messages on FB the last couple of days and did not mention a thing??? Heck my neices that I am close to could have sent me a message or called me. My niece said that her mom (my sister in law) was in the hospital (and going to be fine) but she didn't say my mom was five doors down!!

Granted they are all on the west coast....I am on the east coast but sometimes I feel like extended family not immediate family. It's like I am a bit of an afterthought...."oh maybe we should tell J" days later. Grr. I'm done venting. I am thankful my mom is ok.

Thursday, March 25, 2010


Yes the all capitals mean I am yelling. I never yell.

Today started out fine enough. We had a 4H field trip to a state forest to listen to a ranger give a class on products we get from wood. (some were surprising too!) It started to rain so we went under a big picnic shelter and the ranger tried to build us a fire...unfortunately the wood was too wet. The sun came out shortly after the talk and we all had a nice lunch together. THEN we went for a hike. I like hiking as anyone who knows me can tell you. My children (generally) really enjoy it too. Here was the sign-

But did I take heed to the warning? Did I even consider that maybe...just maybe the walk would be too much for the A~man? NOOOOO! It started out allright. Z~girl ran ahead with the others which is fine as I have known this group for years. Slowly...with each step A~man and I got further behind. Then the wining started, then the tears, then the screaming, and then the refusal to move one step in any direction. Well when you are hiking there comes a time when you are not sure if turning around will be shorter or finishing the trail. He was screaming/swearing awful things at me. (who taught him that? some were made up swear words ;) He was saying I was pulling his arm off and similiar ghastly things. I wasn't. When I let go of his hand he had a fit when I took it he had a fit. Then he sat. Meanwhile I'm texting my hubby like crazy as I am wondering if he may need to come rescue me...uhhh ...I mean us. It was out in the boonies though and the texts were sporadic. So sporadic that my hubby was starting to worry about us. One of the other moms came down and offered to give him a ride on her back. (heheeh he is 85 or so pounds) I threatened not to bring him to the next 4h field trip.....I bribed him...I begged him....I PRAYED. Finally, somehow we made it back down the mountain. Here is the next sign. The sign I SHOULD HAVE maybe considered-

Aww live and learn eh? He cheered up at the bottom and we finished the trip with the kids playing in the old helicopter the state park has. Oh and at the end of the trip what does my young man say? Mom I love you. Today God taught me another lesson in patience and unconditional love. But man I'm exhausted!!

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Flat Stanley is FOUND!!

He was hiding under some papers by the floor mat! So now I can make a photo collage and hubby is going to write a story and get it in the mail ASAP!

Tomorrow is the OBGYN appt YIPPY yeah. :(  It was supposed to be last week but due to ahem circumstances I couldn't have an exam. I pray everything is ok...fortunately I REALLY like this dr/nurses....I have been there for over 15 years. Not a pleasant place to go but it's nice to go to a dr that truly cares and that you are comfortable with. 

I hope to be back to myself soon...this wonderful sunshine should help!

Topsy (if you read this) I took the family to the pie place they loved it too! We need to meet over at the coffee place this week maybe?

Sunday, March 7, 2010

I have LOST Flat Stanley!!!

Yes your read that correctly. A friend from Tx had her son send his Flat Stanley to us...this is a character from a childrens book. This weekend we had a great family weekend planned and brought our paper friend along in hopes of taking his picture on the Appalachian trail. We managed to get his picture on the porch swing at the cabin we stayed at....then he had his picture taken with Z-girl and a really cool red bridge... and then after that we went looking for a trail head. While driving I said "could you get Stanley for me". Flat Stanley was GONE, nowhere to be seen! We drove back to the bridge we last saw him at. We turned the car upside down looking for he missed out on the AT and also on going to a maple farm tour. This sortof put a damper on my day which sounds silly but some 1st grader in TX was depending on me to keep this safe!! Tomorrow I am going to carefully clean out the car (LONG overdue) in hopes Stanley will come out of hiding. If not I may have to come up with a very witty story about his disappearance. The hubby jokingly suggested to say he was standing too close to the campfire! GASP


Friday, March 5, 2010

special prayer needed for a local blog friend (alzheimers)

This is a dear friend that used to watch my children when they were tots. She also has a very powerful blog dealing with her caring for her husband who has alzheimers. A couple weekends ago he came down with an infection, was hospitalized and almost passed away. Miraculously he didn't but my friend had realized she needed help caring for him and was looking into facilities. Days later she fell and broke her ankle and now SHE is in a assisted care facility. :( She is an AWESOME woman...a warrior.. a wonderful life story. She is from Belgium. Anyway now her daughter and son are caring for the dad while they try to find a place for him to live.

Any prayers from my friends would be appreciated. That she can come back home very soon...and have some peace and comfort.


I do not talk politics so this isn't concerning our current president. ;)

This week I have felt introspective, quiet, and in a melancholy sort of mood. This isn't like me. This month though I'm pretty certain I'm entering the CHANGE. Most likely it's been going on the last couple years but the GYN has not seen week I have an appt...trying not to worry that it is some other horrid problem...with my infertility issues...most likely it is just a new chapter about to open up. I'm just not ready for it. Geeze...sometimes it's hard not to wonder why that function of my body has never been normal. I will be 40 this summer. My mom had ME when she was 41...I do not admit it freely but was hoping for a last surprise....Oh woe is me. I am so blessed. 

I just looked up the definition of WOE the antonym is my it's time to get over this mindset. Right?

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Part 2 - Haiku to the Nice Lady (11-06-2005)

Peering through the glass

Hoping to get just one peek
She stands looking out
Wondering why he looks in.

Today was a perfect lazy day. We did not go to church as A-man has the sniffles and we did not want to share with the kids in his class some of which are medically fragile. So I slept late and dh made french toast and scrambled eggs a rare treat! Dh spent the morning watching Dumbo and part of Cinderella with the kids. These came yesterday from Netflix. I cleaned the kitchen and read blogs. Then we went looking at used SUV's...still not sure what type to get or whether to wait until spring. Then we went downtown to walk, to window shop, get a coffee and of course let A-man get a glimpse of the Nice Lady . No we are not stalking her. We sat on the bench in front of her shop and I saw a copper art thingy for the yard that had another thingy that spinned. Great description huh? I really want it for our back deck but I will wait.

We love to people watch and that is what we did. I have always been fascinated with differences in people, not in a bad way, just in a way that God made everyone so wonderful and unique. A man went by and I thought of a an online friends precious son. This handsome young man had half of an arm and it had a bit of a hook on the end...kindof like one finger. Well he was using it to hold a bag he was carrying. This will sound odd but it looked so cool and convenient. Like it was just made for that. Another man came walking by that dh and I have talked with that is on the Autism spectrum. He is just so interesting and sees the world so differently. He likes to talk about the weather and sports mainly. He seems to like seeing us downtown as he knows we will say hi. Anyway people watching was a highlight of our day and the weather was gorgeous and unseasonably warm...probably close to 80.

When we got home I made pigs in blankets and broccoli/cauliflowers with cheese sauce. Afterwards dh and the kids worked on a dinosaur present that A-man got from his party. It was a block of sand that you chipped away until you got to the dinosaur.

Tomorrow the A-man will stay home as he is still under the weather. Z-girl will go to preschool...not sure if she will like going knowing her buba will be home with me and she will not.

Friday, February 26, 2010

10 years ago this weekend...

we were blessed with the sweetest baby boy that came to live with us. It has been an adventure ever since. I have another blog and in honor of A~man's coming home weekend I am going to repost a blog entry from years of my favorites. It is titled-

THE GRUMPY LADY (11-05-2005 ) PART I

My son is obsessed with the grumpy lady....let me explain who she is.

DH and I ten or so years ago lived riding bikes. Sometimes we would actually ride our bikes to work. Well it was a Sunday afternoon some 10 years ago when we first encountered The Grumpy Lady We were downtown (downtown=antique shops, art galleries, coffee shops, boutiques) with a group of friends and decided to get an iced drink at the coffee shop. Well we put our bikes next to this brick wall pillar as at the time there were no bike thingies to put them in. Out of this art gallery comes this crabby woman YELLING at us that we HAD to move we were going to smear her windows and block her store Now we were NOT teenagers we were adults had she talked to us in a civil manner I would not be sitting here talking about the bitty.

Well fast forward to summer of 2005...DH works downtown and most days before he gets out of work the kids and I take our afternoon walk up and down the street. As A-man says "we are getting our excercise" Well initially he was drawn to Grumpy Lady's store as there were huge copper sculptures of lions, elephants (which he is also obsessed with)..Well he put his hands up to the window touching it and I said "oh no don't do that the grumpy lady will come out!" So there and then against my better judgement I told him the story of the Grumpy Lady So now obviously SHE has been his newest obsession....

Well a couple weeks ago we all decided to go to Hannah Flannagans for dinner which btw is located downtown. There was a 15 minute wait so we stood outside as it was a nice evening. Well....guess who I see walking down the street towards us?? Grumpy Lady Now I started to go into panic mode...My son is known to say ANYTHING and EVERYTHING that comes to his mind. I managed to get dh's attention and we distracted ds by having his back turned and we pointed to a pretty girl.(it's the only thing I could think of and he LIKES pretty girls ) Phew we thought we avoided an incredibly uncomfortable situation....WRONG! She walks back up the sidewalk back to her store...I guess she forgot something? It's too late he sees her....he attracts her attention...he starts into his "what's your name?" she tells him. Well he says it.............ARE YOU THE GRUMPY LADY?? I feel myself sinking into the sidewalk...I turn...I HAVE to and start talking to Z-girl acting like I didn't hear what A-man said...I let dh deal with's still an embarassing blur in my mind.

So after she leaves we explain to him that it wasn't a very nice thing to say. In all reality of course it was OUR fault and it came back to bite us on the butt. So now and evermore she is referred to as The Nice Lady with the Art Gallery

Topsy can you figure out who/where this happened??? HAHAHHA

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Show and Tell time!

I really want to start doing this once a week....sometimes more and sometimes less. This is a local homeschool mom. Her boys are now in college but she still likes to keep in touch with the homeschool community. She has created these really nice unit studies. I can see any type "homeschool" benefiting from them. Our family is pretty ecclectic with a dose of unschooling thrown in. They have a LOT of info in them...more than a months worth! We have gotten the tree unit study, early settlers, and Christmas unit study. Most likely we will be getting the horse and bird one in a couple months.
 You will find it here.

Monday, February 22, 2010

worst fear for a mama.....

Losing their child. I have had nightmares about this. Especially with a child that knows no strangers...has no fear...and has a hard time staying focussed. This became a reality this weekend.

We belong to a girls running club and Sunday was the first "fun run" we all participated in. There was a large crowd as before the fun run there was a 5K race. During Z's race I was trying to take pictures of Z, of her club members and of a couple other friends of hers. Part of the time hubby was with me and part he was at a different part of the course. Looking back I realize A~man was with me...then the race was over...spoke to a friend and hurried to the finish line where hubby and Z were. I get there....we look at each other and said at the same time "WHERE IS A~man???" I turn around and it is a HUGE crowd and walk back to where I was. It isn't long and I see him walking up the hill with a casual friend of ours. <<>> I left my son with AS !!!! She told me he came up to her chatted and said he was a little lost. *sob* I thanked her and praised him for finding someone he knew! I am PUSHING that guilt out of my head....but I am so thankful he realized what to do. (find someone he knew) I am also thankful she was there...actually there were many friends there...

What does a parent do when they have a child that needs a little (or a lot) extra supervision? When do they know when to let the strings looser...and when to keep them tight? What about when a younger sibling needs less supervision...gosh this is what I am trying to figure out. I do not want to be too overprotective....yet still protect what it took me so long to have.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Special needs basketball tomorrow!

A~man is BEYOND excited. Our church (I say that but partly due to hubbys schedule we have not been to church since before Christmas....Aman has though hahah)  has an awesome special needs program. The main reason we started going back to church 6 years ago was the fact they have a special needs Sunday school class. Now they have a sn's day program and ds goes to this on Wed afternoons IF his school work is done and he is in a calm mindset . He then stays for dinner at church with his helper.

Anyway I was supposed to be talking about BBall! It starts tomorrow and I so look forward to it. It is all ages and all abilities. From a 5 yr old to 40 or high functioning autism to profound MR in a wheelchair. (with a helper :) I do not cry easily. BUT I have tears in my eyes at one point during this event. It's funny, entertaining and uplifting! I plan to take lots of pictures.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010



a few words on the effects of caffiene on the unsuspecting....

from my husband. He's working tonight -he does some assistive living in a rental house we have with a young man that has autism, bipolar, and a few other things. Z and I met the two of them for coffee is the story although I may have to edit a couple words hee hee.

I have learned a valuable lesson today on Barrista's and how important the dosage is to double check.
When they say "here is your fruity frozen delicious non-caffeinated drink have a nice day." It pays to ask "are you sure that is decaf?" I am sure there there are folks that have caffeine allergies, enjoy sleeping at night or just plain want a fruity frozen delicious non-caffeinated drink that would appreciate the reasurrance of some kind of CAR(caffeine administration record). I assume today was a mistake as I have never seen the young lady before and have not to my knowledge ****** (made her mad) off in some way. Maybe she was having a bad day and decided to pass some of it along to her unsuspecting guests. Maybe I reminded her of her 5th grade science teacher that failed her for no reason. Maybe it was quite the opposite. Perhaps she enjoyed a hard hitting middle of the night caffeine buzz and said "this is a good thing I will pass it along so someone else can enjoy it.

The moral: a double shot of espresso cleverly administered in a sugary frozen drink late in the day can make one's day interesting.

We were about to leave and this girl brings us another frozen drink over explaining that she had mixed his wrong. I am sure big T, my hubby, and my eyes bugged out at realizing this. What he thought was a frozen non caffeine fact....had a couple shots of espresso in it. So now my husband is dealing with..well...a whole lot right now. HE will likely not sleep tonight. Sortof funny.....but not. ;)

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

My Son....

is such a mystery. Technically speaking....on paper he is developmentally delayed, autism, MR, Prader-willi, his bio parents where borderline...etc etc.  He is also such an awesome child...he is a people person...he is a people (well peeps over 15;) Magnet. If we go somewhere I have learned...there is no hurry...most people WANT to talk to him. (and those are the people I especially like :) His bio grandma said when he was a baby he was going to be a preacher...I chuckled inside at that when he was a babe but gosh if it is possible for a SN's person to be one he will be.

This year I have pondered if he would be able get addition and subtraction concrete. It's been YEARS working on this...he's 10...sometimes he will get it and other times (usually during the yearly required testing I HATE TESTING;) he will act like he has never heard of the concept. Reading has been a similiar process...he is 10 but at a barely 2nd grade will seem like he has it....then 3 steps forward 4 steps back.

But the questions he asks! now sometimes they are questions he knows the answers to, questions to irk someone, but then he comes up with some that make ME think!

Today (and I should have written down the exact words as they were better than mine) he asked where we were before we were born. Were we dead? I told him that God knew of us before we were born but that I didn't know the answer to his question. His mind is constantly working....

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Secret message Valentines!

I wish this idea was originally mine but I found it here- while looking here- which is one of my favorite places for fun things to make. Both A and Z loved their valentines!

The hubby bought Z and I roses and of course both kids received some little surprises. All in all a very sweet day!!