horrible no good day

It was a horrible no good day for the A~man. Days like this are rare, but from the time he woke up things went downhill for him. Normally when things start out badly we are able to redirect and divert his attention onto better things. Not today. It's the first full day that hubby has had off in awhile which was much needed as he has hurt his back. (which might be a possible reason for A~man's day...he does not like to see someone in pain)

All day long he was doing something he shouldn't, saying something he shouldn't...which resulted in an afternoon of emotional tears at the pool by the end of the afternoon. It started out that he was mad at me as I took an old phone away from him today. Phones have always been an issue for him. This phase seems over but he has stolen a phone from a friend years ago and of course up until a year ago he would snatch the phone from his sometimes scatterbrained mama and call people. Lots of people.

 Today's issue was a phone that a sweet friend of his gave him. (the phone didn't work anymore) She's actually a friend of Z's and he has been pestering her about it and finally, with her mom's permission, she gave A~man the old phone. The problem? 1. His newest issue is talking to people when we are out of earshot and asking them to bring him something. (not normally food ironically) I do not like this. Well, I like how nice people are as they will bring him something. BUT I do not want my son begging for stuff as it is not good. 2. I knew that he had been pestering our friend "H" to bring it to him and I told him he could not have it, but when I wasn't around she gave it to him. (she didn't know I said no) So I took it today. Broke his heart. :( Not what I wanted to do but I could see this asking situation getting out of hand as a life guard actually brought him his old Nintendo last week. (ended up not working...a whole nuther drama in itself) I appreciate the generosity but it had to stop. 

The other big issue today was due to the fact that A~man is girl crazy. He was born girl crazy. He will get in his head that someone (normally a girl between 16-21) is his girl friend. He truly thinks this. His love interest now is the very sweet and pretty lifeguard at the pool we go to. Today in the pool I told him for the millionth time that 1. He cannot have a girlfriend when he is 13. 2. That a girl 16+ is not going to be his girl friend. I told him "K" the lifeguard is not his girlfriend. I hurt his feelings with this. :(  Evidently before I got in the pool, (I was in the gym working out) hubby and A~man were in the hot tub and this oaf of a man (not referring to my husband I should add...this was a stranger ;) was giving my son inappropriate dating advice concerning the lifeguard. In actuality the beyond middle aged man was using my son to flirt with the lifeguard. *why my hubby didn't stop that I do not know*

Puberty and growing up is hard enough for a typically developing child but add in developmental challenges and it adds to the confusion. He talks about when he "lives in his own house", when he gets married and has kids, about how he is going to join the Army. The list goes on and on. These things are very likely not going to happen. He does have a lot of strengths and a lot of possibilities in his future though and I pray to God to help us help him discover them so he can reach the full potential God has for him.

Then there is the Z~girl. She is entering that territory too this last year. I've seen so much growth from her but being this age is challenging. I see so much of me in her right now. (the good and not so good) What does her future hold? She has had it in her head for many years that she wants to be a veterinarian. She LOVES animals and is very good with them. She will start back at the goat farm in the next month and she is very excited. She is doing awesome with the chickens we have that are about to be able to be moved outside. (thank goodness as my basement smells like a barn) It's a time of transition for her. She and I need to completely redo and clean out her room this spring. This will involve getting rid of "little kid" stuff that needs to go. Admittedly, this will be as hard on me as her. (I had really hoped there would be one more child in our life) So we will decide a handful of things to keep for her future children. Books, hahah though are non negotiable but hopefully I can move some downstairs to a huge bookcase we have. 

I moved far away from family. Then they moved even further away. Haha, no it wasn't anything personal, it was just the way things turned out. I TRULY hope that we can always live within driving distance of Z when she grows up. I am encouraged by the increasing amount of homeschool-friendly colleges across the country though. I fully intend to continue and homeschool for highschool and pray for guidance from above in helping her too to achieve her own personal potential. 

I think that today I came to the realization that growing up, well, seeing your children growing up feels as hard on the mama (and daddy) as it does on the child.