am I CRAZY or what??

*warning..this is just a lot of ramble. My normal posts about PWS, autism, homeschooling, etc etc will return in August...I hope! ;) *

Heather if you read this the book I am reading is Quaker Summer . It is excellent. In fact the main characters name is Heather.

On with the crazy thoughts. I seriously want one more baby. With infertility I wonder if this feeling will ever go away? I always dreamed of having a baby at 40-41...like my mother (ME) and like both of my grandmothers. Now I'm not talking about getting pregnant. (although God surprised me with Z-girl!) I mean becoming mommy for a third time which would have to be through foster care. The foster care system with A-man aged me...but I can go into the next room, kiss his sweet face and know it was worth it and meant to be. Most likely we would have to go through another county as...well...we have a reputation here. (for fighting for what is right...which is not necessarily what DSS wants) Do I have it in me? I feel like my motives are purely selfish. Sure I want to help a child that needs a home...but even more so I want another baby in my arms.

Oh and if you knew how busy my current life currently can be...you would wonder what I was thinking. PWS is a constant journey filled with ups and downs. I told my mom last year briefly awhile back that I wanted another. She said " I hope you do not get one with problems." To give her the benefit of the doubt she is 81 and the language with disabilites is different than what she knows. I have went off on her a couple times (God forgive me ;) for comments. In my heart I think most likely it will be a child with extra needs. Anyway that's enough for tonight.

soul searching...

So much I could blog about I do not know where to start. I did turn 40 a week ago...lol. So I have been doing a lot of thinking about stuff and just cannot express it all right now. I do have a very fun overnight trip (hubbys bday present to me!) with a couple friends in a couple weeks. Spa and the great outdoors. I can't wait.

I am reading a really good book right now. I do not think it is an accident I picked it up at the library. It's on spirituality, church, serving God...good stuff like that.  We haven't attended church much this year. Our son has as he sometimes attends the special needs program they have. The church is HUGE. I won't/can't say anything negative about the church just that I wonder if somewhere smaller would be better. I'm hoping God will lead us somewhere.

I hope to get back blogging and doing artsy stuff soon! Z and I are working on some sewing projects though.

What every mom needs to hear periodically

"You are doing a good job mom!" from a stranger. I love when this happens. It happens quite often with my kiddos.

 Today because A~man got a certain amount of tokens this week ( a token system I started mainly for daycamp but also for reinforcing positive behavior at home) we went "downtown" for a soda and to play in a very cool old time arcade. (I'm dating myself...hubby and I used to play in arcades) When we were leaving the lady that was running the place came up to me and said "you are doing a good job mom!" plus a few other things that made me say thank you with a huge ole sappy grin on my face. : D

It couldn't have come at a better time as I was in tears last night. A~man stole a friends cell phone out of her purse yesterday and the little miss has been very sassy to me...but only at home. *sigh* I do my best but sometimes it gets exasperating. But to have people see that my children DO have good manners, they are not afraid to speak to adults at all...that makes it all worth while.

My two puzzle me though. At home A~man (for the most part) is respectful, helpful, cooperative, and affectionate. Z-girl? at home she can be sassy, disrespectful and ...lol...sassy. She is hardly EVER  this way in public...A`man well he has most of his issues outside of the house. Go figure.

I love them so much though....I love being mama!!

appreciating the ups

Isn't that what life is about? Life would be so boring if we got everything we wanted, when we wanted it, how we wanted it. Fortunately that is NOT how God works. But it is important to sieze the good moments to give you strength during the difficult times.

It's funny...the pic of A`man on the beach examining something...I have a very similiar picture of him at 3....doing the same thing. Mr inquisitive! The last picture reminds me we forgot to take a picture of my little mermaid with a sand tail....we have done this for several years...a good excuse for a trip to Charleston later on!!

Bittersweet holiday...

I am very thankful I had a hardworking dad that enjoyed spending time with me. It has been 6 years. I wish he could have been able to know my children as big kids but I'm glad he met them as young children. This picture is one of my nieces, great nephew, my dad, Z~girl, and my mom. I need to scan some pictures of my dad and I. The last one is A and Z with their grandma and grandpa E.

Our trip...our adventure!

Keep in mind...if you have read my blog at all...things hardly ever go as planned. That is just how it is.

We arrived at isle of palms midday on Tuesday. It was hot. I was warned. It was hot. Where I live it was maybe in the 80's. There? it had a heat index of 112. It was like a hot moist oven. Now I remember why we normally go earlier in the year. We ate lunch, watched cartoons (a treat...we do not watch tv) and in the evening we went to a nice restaurant and then went to the pool and beach. Well Z girl went swimming. With prader-willi syndrome their body has a hard time regulating temperature. A~man got really sleepy...he slept a lot.

On Wed morning he was still very sleepy in the morning but it was much cooler...only about 90. ;) The hubby and I took turns taking Z out while A~man stayed inside. My favorite moments of the trip were Z and I riding bikes on the beach...taking breaks ever so often to go in the ocean. It was such special time just her and I. In the afternoon we went to Boone Hall Plantation . We really enjoyed this. I would like to go back when it is cooler so we could spend more time. I especially loved the Gullah presentation. That night? mmmmm crablegs!

Thursday morning we had planned to wake up and go next door for bluecrab omelates..and then go explore downtown Charleston for souviners. .mmmm....but wait what really happened? it was 8ish....the kids were starting to wake up. At 8:30 I heard ds in my suitcase but told him to go back to bed for a little bit. DD starts yelling he has something in his mouth.What? childrens tylenol. I go looking for the wrappers to figure out how many he had (turned out to be the dose for his age) when I find an empty bottle of benedryl in the trash. OH CRAP. I know there was a bit over half so we called poison control...if it would have been half a bottle the recommendation would have been to let him sleep it off. We were not sure so we packed up FAST and went to the ER. Meanwhile he keeps falling asleep. It took a bit to explain about the PWS and the autism as they were asking if A`man said WHY he took it. Everyone was so nice. It took awhile but he drank the charcoal...we had to sit for a couple hours...he was NOT happy as poison control said no food until he was seen by a dr. He is fine. I am fine...I guess. At home we keep meds locked up or out of his reach.I just figured he wouldn't get into the suitcase...or the med. Next time we will get a lock for the suitcase. MOMMY GUILT ugggg.

I do have a lot of nice pictures to share later of the funner moments. :)

Going on an adventure...

to one of my favorite southern places...well south/east. I am so excited!! Of course I need to wake up in 5 hours and I am still packing. I'm hoping to share some awesome pictures and tales of our adventures!!