Friday, September 14, 2012

Always picked last...

I think everyone MUST at one time or another know what it is like as a kid to be picked last. (heck sometimes it happens in different situations with adults) There were many years that I experienced that as a kid. I was unusually tall for my age, skinny, and had two left feet. I remember standing there in PE just knowing...dreading being the last choice when kids had to choose team mates for a game. 

Today the hubby took both kids to a PE class that one of the homeschool groups we belong to has. Although I did hear from hubby that the teams were unfair, it sounded as if both kids had fun. But ever since getting home something was bothering Z. I just thought she was tired and a bit sunburned...but I also noticed tears every once in awhile.

After A~man was in bed she came to me and asked- Why is A~man always picked last??? Her heart was just crumpled. She then said - I was so glad that we got to be on the same team! My daughter has a heart of gold. She loves her brother deeply. Yes, there are times he completely pushes beyond her patience threshold and they do fight but they have such a deep connection. What does a mama say when asked that question?

I know it's just something that happens. Kids want the fastest, quickest thinking, athletic, and easiest to get along kid to be on their team. It's human nature to want to win. I get that. I told Z that I thought one of the many reasons God put A~man here is to teach others to be more compassionate, kind, empathetic, caring and patient towards others that are different. I really doubt he noticed that he was the last picked. Sometimes it is painful for even me to see (or should I say especially for me to see) that peers avoid him like the plague. Hopefully though, they will come out a lot better person in the end by the things they learn from being around someone with differences. Differences that make a child say things they shouldn't, do things without thinking,not know exactly the right way to interact, and not completely understanding a game.

I truly believe that people, kids included, can and will learn more from my son then they can ever imagine. Somehow in his uniqueness he is the teacher despite his challenges. Oh, and his sister? Part of what makes both of them such awesome little people (ok I can't call them little for much longer ;) is the result of what they have gotten from being such close siblings and friends. 


  1. You're a great mom. I don't know that I would have been able to think of such a wonderful response. My heart goes out for him, and for his sister. She sounds amazing - actually, both of them do!

  2. Such a great perspective Joy and true. Watching our kids struggle is the hardest part of parenting and yet in the end it is this struggle within our arms and with our support that helps them become who they are to become. What a beautiful little heart your Z has. :) You are a great Mom!

  3. I do believe that might be my favorite pic yet of Z-girl and A-man. Beautiful!! Those are 2 amazing kiddos you are raising there, mama! Proud, proud, proud to know them.